Thursday, August 20, 2009

the physical

the physical effects of this are pretty real. within a few days of Jarronn's passing, i lost eight pounds. (i had hoped to lose five pounds of honeymoon/newlywedded bliss weight, but certainly not like this). my digestive system has been unstable for the past three weeks, so that even though i've regained my appetite, it's hard to see eating as something to look forward to. not sure if it's nerves or that my stomach has forgotten how to respond.

there's also the exhaustion. regular things i was used to doing everyday wipe me out. and the exhaustion tends to make me vulnerable to a range unpleasant emotions...


  1. i never would have thought about it before, but it certainly makes sense. the mind, body, and soul all work together. when one is in peril, the others start to go out of wack also. this is where you have to take your time, eat what you can when you feel up to it, and stay strong. just remember that no matter how hard it is, the best way to honor Him is to be strong and move on with your life to the best of your ability. and you know if He was here He wouldn't allow you to be like this. all you can do is your best and try to live every minute and every day as it comes. i'm with you in spirit, cuz (and so is Jarronn!)

  2. If you don't feel like eating, at least try drinking Ensure to get your calories and daily your immune system stays strong. It helped me when I was going thru something similar. They have strawberry, vanilla, and chocolate.

    Peace hun.

  3. Oh Jess, I am just reading this... I agree with Lo. At least Ensure can give you the basics. I know a few people who stuck with that when they couldn't keep food down.

  4. I love you Jessica...for the woman that you are and how God is using you, even now, to touch the hearts of so many. I read your blog the other day about strength and trust me--YOU ARE STRONG!!! There are several unfavorable responses you could have taken, but you didn't go there. I look forward to reading your thoughts each and every day and want you to know that even as someone who was only a casual friend to you that I am deeply touched and want to do any and everything that I can to be there for you. PLEASE let me know if I can ever be an ear to listen or a shoulder to lean on. Even if you need help cleaning the kitchen :). On another note, in addition to drinking Ensure, remember to take your vitamins. Love you! Summer

  5. Ensure worked for me as well, fruit and smoothies sometimes hold you over. Love you!

  6. I love you Jessica! You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers constantly. ~Sheree Whittle

  7. Jessica,
    Ensure is a great suggestion. Try just eating a little bit at a time if you can. I don't know if you are into this, but exercise can be a great release for your emotions and it will take you away from the day-to-day. Group classes are really helpful too :) You will make it one day at a time.

  8. In addition to the many confiming comments on Ensure, I agree with Summer who said to take a vitamin. Try one that has a bigger dose that the ones you may have taken before, just because odds are that you have lost more essencial nutriets in the past couple of days and need to recover your stores before you get really sick. Women's Once a Day is a good one, or Centruim Multivitamin. It should help some, and I know every little bit counts.

    And it makes sence that your tired physically. Your lacking the vitamins & minerals you need, which I know first hand opens up your emotions. When you can't be physically strong, you usually don't have the strenght to be that way emotionally either.

    But, the great thing is that no matter what, Christ is still your strength. I never expected you to be strong Jessica. Instead my prayer is that He show up, and as always, be strong for you.

    I love you sis.

  9. Loss of appetite and energy can be signs of depression also. As you take time to process your emotions, you will find that these may slowly improve. Being aware of what is happening inside of you will help you to make responsible choices even when you don't feel like it, for your health's sake. Try to pour yourself into anything that brings you even a little joy/ sense of purpose. It will help you to slowly emerge out of sadness even while you process things.

    Love you always